What's Your Sign?

Eden Park Drive exit. McMillan Ave before Interstate 71. Corner of Auburn. Ridge Ave South exit on the corner. Taft exit - 1st Stoplight. Homeless people with signs fashioned of cardboard and indelible black marker held up by dirty fingers. At best they're simply listing their problems and asking for help, at worst it's manipulation in 20 words or less. And I might add, they're pretty skilled. One sign says, "Homeless and hungry. Anything helps. God bless!" Another sign says, "Hungry. Out of work. Need a kidney." Wait! Kidney? Yes, kidney. Some even ask for specific items on their signs, like a certain kind of food.

The topic came up at lunch today. So the deep philosophical question was posed, "What would your cardboard sign say?" Hannah Emery's sign simply states, "Poor college student. Tired of taking mama's money. Need a car. Cell phone busted. God bless!" Mel says, "Cheap College Kid with sweet-tooth. Need Oreos." We wondered where they get the sharpie markers to write the sign. John pipes in, "It's written in blood." Here's one, "Homeless. Roommate has swine flu. Need place to live."

So the next time you see a sad face attached to a cardboard sign on the side of the road, promptly tell them, "I'M the poor college student. You give ME food and money!"