Okay, I've Had Enough

I love the weather in northeastern Ohio. Ever since I got home I have watched the snow fall every day and enjoyed it immensely. In fact when I was on the phone today I was getting sick of it and just wanted to go outside and build a snowman or jump into the snow and just lay there. The only part of me that justifies not going out is the many things I have to do and the fact that I am going sled riding tomorrow so i will do it then. It's a horrible feeling - that feeling of adulthood. Where I'd just love to go out and play in the snow like a kid. Most everything inside of me just yells out, "I'm a kid at heart." So that's my vindication, and what a good notion - however old you get, never be too old to play in the snow!


Perhaps you may/may not have heard about it, but there is a bit of a local kerfuffle in my hometown area. My mother is following the sentencing religiously. Local former policeman murdered his nine month pregnant girlfriend by strangling her to death. It's a really sad story. I guess what bewilders me is how closely my mom is tracking the whole ordeal, listening to the radio for the final trial/sentence proceedings, the press conferences, etc. She even encourages us to turn it on and listen, which I think is a little too much. But I suppose its the fact that it's a local cop and a local story that arouses her interest, and the interest of her family, and even the entire town. Nothing peaks curiosity like a local story on crime that hits home. It's even on the front page of CNN.com - he was sentenced 57 years to life today escaping the death penalty. What I find very ironic is how the prosecution was so tight about the life of an unborn child and yet most of our society is okay with the fact that millions of unborn children are already purposefully murdered each year. *raises eyebrows*

Oh and another thing that makes me laugh and amuses me: we've been getting political calls on our answering machine. You know, those spiels on who to vote for. "Hope for America!" Ha.

We gotta phone call...church was cancelled tonight due to bad weather. I think I will go outside and play in the snow *smiles*

-Sam

Honey, I'm Home!

Welp, I'm home, and glad to be I must say. I arrived yesterday morning...but let me start at the "beginning". Mid-winter break started Wednesday at college but I didn't leave for a couple of days. I stayed around and cleaned, packed, and did homework. Must admit it was pretty lonely, about the only people that stay for break are the international students and the people who work. I did get a chance to play volleyball with the choir before they left and we watched a movie [Facing the Giants] the next night.

Mr. Shin found out that I was staying a few days during break and asked if I liked spicy food. After I told him yes, he said, "You come my room. Eat Korean. Spicy." I smiled and thanked him. Thursday he comes over at lunch and announces to me that I should come to his room in 20 minutes. I came as well as Yago, and he fixed us rice with a potato/onion/Korean sauce topping, cabbage with hot pepper sauce (which he says he goes through a [approx.] 2 lb. can a week), complete with dried seaweed squares. He showed us how to place the seaweed on top of the food and stuff it into our mouths and crunch it down. (It reminded me of a tastier, dried, more manly version of sushi) However, I gagged slightly at the texture of the seaweed. The taste wasn't horrible, but I cannot get past the texture. I said that it was "interesting". The next days lunch consisted of a much tastier Korean soup. A much better version of Ramen noodles. 2 packets of Korean noodles and 1 package of Ramen noodles, veggies, seasoning and three eggs. It was spicy and very good! So that was my Korean food experience. Mr. Shin has taught me a bit of Korean language and culture and I have enjoyed learning it and learning about him. After I thanked him (kam sa hab nida) he told Yago and I, "It is not those who have many possessions who are rich, but those who give away who are rich." I smiled and nodded my head.

Friday I hung out with Carrie. I met up with her after she had finished sled riding, and we went out for supper. Chipotle's. Afterwards we hit up the Loveland Goodwill. She makes shopping at Goodwill so much fun. In spite of the lady with yellow hair who smelled, and the girls who talked loudly across rows of clothes, and the cashier with crooked colored teeth and a few ounces too much makeup. I couldn't find a chair for my roommates but came away with an odd t-shirt. She got shoes and a gray sweatshirt. A perfect color for a rainy day. All the snow on the ground and it was raining. She made it a fun day. We adventurized and explored.

I guess that's where I got my adventurous spirit because I went to bed at 830PM that night and woke up (after resetting my alarm twice and going through 20 minutes of the snooze) at 350AM. After shower, coffee, devotions, and packing my car I left at 545. I drove amid the snow flurries and salty splashes of passing cars for four hours and stopped once for gas, doughnuts and an energy drink. Just me, Toby, and my music. I called Janette too and we talked for a little while. (She works nights @ the hospital.)

It feels odd coming home now. I feel so established in Cincinnati like that is my new home. It's great to be welcomed and feel loved by everyone, but I guess things are just different at home. I guess I'm starting to see pictures of what they talked about - things that I never really saw. Details are just details but the heart of it is spiritual warfare. I'm just tired of smiling at everybody, but they make me smile, and I feel like smiling, I have much to smile about, I guess it's just when you come home from college everyone says "Hi". [I could never live the life of a celebrity.] That's not what I'm comparing it to!...just all the people glad to see me, and the smiling....okay I'm diggin a hole here, I'll stop.

Decided on writing my essay on loneliness. Got a little taste of it on break. It definitely affected me. I'm also going to do homework all break so that I will be free for the video project when I get back, and just the ease of no homework for a little while. Sure it's weird doing homework on break, but I'd like to get ahead.

One more thing, it snowed bunches before I left Cinci, that made me happy. Finally all this snow!....and no school to appreciate the day off. Such...is...life.

Well I'm tired...Maybe the update was too long. *shrugs*
*nods goodbye*

-Sam

Happy today, somewhere in the middle of winter

I appreciate this day.

I first heard Dr. Phil speak on modesty this morning [PCL2] and heard him say things that a friend of mine and I discussed very recently and said to myself, "It's about time." 2nd period: I preached for the first time in Intro. to Homiletics and it went very well. Third period we had no quiz and watched a video. Now that constitutes a good class. Fourth: Physical Science test, which was not all that hard. At lunch today I sat down with Mel, Mr. Profitt, and Dr. Phil, talked about conjugating the word 'text', and dying to self. Was surprised when Dr. Phil complimented me on the quality of my homework in his class. Humbled me to know that what I did was 'beyond average' I intend to use my God-given intelligence for His glory. Speaking again in Teen Power this evening: same topic as my sermon, but I will bring it from a college level to a teen level, add more application.

It's cold outside today - typical of winter. The wind is extra fierce - made my eyes water.

Here's a quote from my roommate. Enjoy!

"I can’t resist a good cheesecake. I can’t resist a good nap. So goodbye cruel world." -Nolan Sams

-Sam McConkey

I Must Blog

Yes, I must. I told Melissa that I would explain...It's snowing outside, the wind is whipping around, the snow is falling down, and as we exited the building with the weather in our faces all I could hear was the sound of wind and heels. Yes, that click-clack of high heels hitting the cement. A very cool sound, please don't misunderstand me. I attach no bad-connotation to it, but I think that the connotation is one of style, arrogance, and feminism. A "listen-to-my-heels-click" mentality. Granted, here at bible college, I would not accuse any girl of this notion. In our modern culture stylish, sexy, and feministic (femi-nazi) are what goes, and perhaps that is what I associate it with - forgive me. It is simply what pops into my head when I hear the sound. Just like I will not eat Tilapia (very good tasting type of fish) anymore because the last time I ate it I was very sick and lost it. It is the whole sound-image/action pyschology thing.

Blasted snow won't stick to the ground! Today's weather was very weird. It snowed all day and barely any of it stuck to the ground. The temperature is hovering around freezing so that any snow we got melted. This gives the snow turning into water effect, and the sun shining while it snows. Also, while it was snowing I heard a loud peal of thunder and Mylon said that he saw a flash of lighting...in a snow storm! No, I'm not kidding. Now my intelligent guess is that being that it was snowing, but fairly warm all day, the warm temperature collided with the cold snow and created the thunder/lighning. I mean, isn't that how thunderstorms start, warm and cold air coming together. Thereby causing a tornado/blizzard. So now we have powdered sugar in the grass, and the wind is still whipping and snowflakes and sporadicaly dancing through the air as the night begins.

So I preach for the first time in my life tomorrow. Topical sermon on selfishness. Opening joke/quote, a few examples with text from the Bible on selfishness, an illustration and a main text with application at the end. Should go well (with God's help).

So do you ever get those feelings of confusion, where you don't know what you just said or why you said it. I do. I confuse myself. Things were particularly crazy studying for my Physical Science test in the library with Vita and Leanna tonight. Let's just say that.

Oh look. I got my hair cut.



I love how everyone states the obvious. It's so amusing. "Oh, you got your hair cut." "I see you got your hair cut." "Did you get your hair cut?" "Wow, your hair's gone." D-U-H. I have been thinking of various responses to give to people when they comment about my sudden "loss of hair" or rather decrease in length of hair follicles on my head. My general response has been, "I lost my wig." or "Delilah did it." In fact, I am quite worried that Philistines will pop around the corner at any moment and take my weak body captive and pluck my eyes out! Agh, oooh! The good news that is that I have had a few people compliment me on my cut. However, there was one unhappy soul who was not elated but shocked at my hair cut, he said that he liked it long. Oh well. The deed's been done. Mr. Parriman even asked who I was. Here are the general responses: "Hey, you got your hair cut." or "Hey, I like your hair. Looks good." or "Is that you? I didn't even recognize you at first."

Okay now that I've rambled on about my hair cut...

Winter break is almost here. What do you think about that?

-Sam

The Heart

Well, tomorrow is Anti-Singles Day, or Valentines Day as most of you like to call it. Happy loving to all you couples out there. I am content with being patient. No really. Maybe I look like a guy who's got it all together, but it's hit me hard and God has had to teach me a lot about relationships. Therefore, I am developing discernment and practicing patience amid a sea of crazed couples here on campus. Not to mention the shocking comments on couples and Valentines Day made by President Avery in chapel today. He is Mr. Matchmaker at his best. I must confess I wish I had the time to elaborate on "the true meaning of Valentine's Day" like I would on the meaning of Christmas, but I shall leave the research up to you. I know I will sound cheesy, but I will say it anyway. Jesus is my valentine, and I have plenty of friends for valentines. So no thank you Hallmark Card Company, no thank you Hersheys, and no thank you Mr. Avery. Wait, forget what I said about Hershey's.

"We need to learn this secret of the burning heart...The burning heart - a heart that can go through anything. It is the simple, dreary day, with is commonplace duties and people, that smother the burning heart - unless we have learned the secret of abdiding in Jesus....If the spirit of God has stirred you, make as many of your decisions as possible irrecovable, and let the consquences be what they will. We cannot stay forever on the "mount of transfiguration," basking in the light of your mountaintop experience. But we must obey the light we recieved there; we must put it into action. When God gives us a vision, we must transact business with Him at that point, no matter what the cost." -The Burning Heart, Oswald Chambers

I was stirred as Mr. Klotz read Chambers in tonight's D-group. My prayer is, "Father, I want a heart that burns."

Call your mom. Tell her you love her.

-Samuel

Poetry, Prose and Yiddish

Thought I'd post some poetry and prose.

LITTLE WHITE FLAGS

Surrender!
White flags all over the battleground
Bodies and dirt strewn all around
There lies self fallen down
Surrender!
Little white flags on battleground

ON EFFECTIVENESS

Drama, or indeed any presentation [textual, visual, audibal] (especially in ministry) needs to have these three criteria met in order to be truly effective. It must first be entertaining. An entertaining presentation engages the audience and arouses interest in the subject you are presenting. Secondly, it must be enlightening. By enlightening we mean that the presentation must increase the knowledge and understanding of the audience, specifically in a spiritual manner. Finally, the presentation must be inspiring, which causes the individual to take the information he receives and put it into practice. It is essentially a call to action. If any one of these things are lacking, the presentation won't be as powerful as it should be. Without these three dimensions any drama, speech, or presentation would not reach its full potential, and would render it defective and unfulfilling.

-I.W. Owens
-S.L. McConkey
-N.D. Sams


"Shaineh raineh keporah"
[Yiddish]
"Nothing to regret"

-Sam

Update from Sammyville.

Today I heard Jessica Smith playing the most beautiful piano music in the chapel. Live classical music on the piano. Good stuff. It made me want to just sit down and enjoy it, and forget about all the homework I had as I headed up the stairs.

Today was a great day. I classify that as a school day where I get to sleep in. A snow day! It snowed! Just not enough. Okay, yes, I know that's my cynical mind, but I just want to get dumped on with snow. Ice is another possibility. If we get enough again, they'll cancel. I state the obvious.

English paper #1 on use of poetic techniques in a scipture passage is due tomorrow. I just need to brush up mine. It's all done, I am just gonna read it over and fill it out, and add some more foundation and makeup.

And this iced tea is so good. Lipton Cold Brew. Made just the way I like it: 60/40 sugar/tea. Complete with little Hershey's bars. Mmhmm. I'm set for the night.

Christmas lights are down. My ceiling tile looks naked.

Our volleyball team lost horribly. We weren't setting and they were spiking with fierce style.

-Sammy

Winter Waiting

Yes, I wash my dishes at 2:45 in the morning! [To self] Top ten signs you know you're in college...

I have been waiting on the storm to arrive. Right now it just seems like we're getting the wingtips of it. I have gone to the hall, several times, pulled down the blinds a little bit and looked to see if the snow had arrived yet. I'm still waiting. Oh, if they would just cancel classes tomorrow. My three tests would temporarily disappear. I have hoped for the best, and prepared for the worst. Yes, I want the snow to come. I do not yet feel justified. Our winter has been miserly. Bring on the snow!

And may God bless all of you summer lovers with warm winter coats.

Goodnight.

Doughnuts

Doughnuts....ahh, those heavenly things. Clouds of sweetness covered with sugar, things that are sharply destroyed, sliced by the teeth, slicing and conforming its soft dough to the pressure of my jaws. Okay, so today was Student Development day. (That's for all of you who didn't know what today was.) In the beginning I thought it was some weird...administration "we-care-about-our-students" session, which in the end is...exactly what it turned out to be. What I mean is that if you were there, Miss V spoke awesomely. Inwardly I stand for an ovation and salute her. In what we call our 'holiness movement circle' No one ever says anything about it. The silent topic. Oh no...sex. And then Mr. Miles had some very good quotes, below is one,

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." -Marianne Williamson

I shall comment briefly and then leave. Basically, we have a false sense of humility because of our insecurity, and Satan uses it to our disadvantage. Essentially, our desire for the good and the right causes us to not live life fully alive."

Arguments?

Got a call yesterday from Mr. P asking me if I had ever done any video work or anything like that. After a yes explanation he asked me if Isaac and I could do a video for Student Development Day. ["Why do we do, what we do?" "I don't know"]The great news is that this is our dream, doing video work, but the bad news is that they only gave us 18 hours until the showing. We filmed it that evening and did five hours of editing. I went to bed at 600 and woke up at 830. I was kinda nervous about the showing, putting our work onto the screen for everyone to see, but it went great. I guess my point here is this: Our dreams sometimes are buried, but later they are rebirthed. When I surrendered everything I had to God and gave him all my dreams and desires and told him that I would be and do what he wanted me to, it was really me emptying my hands and my God filling them with better, greater things. I now see my dream rising from the ground. Forgive me for being all transparent. My calling is to be a youth pastor. Young people are at the heart of what I love to do, and who I love minstering to, but deep down those dreams I have, I have learned that God has created me with a deep love for creative design, art, photography, videography and the such. Summary: It is when we surrender that God rewards.

She sits eating chocolate cake
Perched on a napkin
Resting in her hand
With a translucent green fork
Poised from her fingers

"You know Sam, I really don't know and I really don't care." -SKW

Already Into Tomorrow

Well I'm into the next day and still with lots of homework to go. I've got a latte with two shots next to me. It's almost 1am. Today was a bit stressful and busy. I never rested once. I normally take a nap with my two free periods, but not today. Strenuous! It really never ended today. I'm still going. Lab tonight was interesting, and what I mean by that is uneventful. I thank God for the friends that I have. The kind who after a long day say, "Hey, lets go somewhere." Starbucks was the choice. Two songs flew through my head tonight. I So Hate Consequences: "And I'm good, good, good to go. Gotta get away. Get away from all of my mistakes" & College Kids: "Someone please save us - Us college kids - What my parents told me is what I did - They said go to school and be a college kid - But in the end I question why I did - Not for me, not for me - Call it tortue - Call it university - Arts and crafts is what I need - I'll take calligraphy and then I'll make a fake degree." Now before you go a'thinking...this is not how I feel at all, but it certainly helps to explain and give a picture that there are some tough times where we become apathetic and say, "I don't care. I want points!" We college kids sometimes are just loaded down (academically, mentally, spiritually)...and honestly that's how I felt tonight...and then I am reminded to wait on the Lord, and he will renew my strength. I will mount up with wings like eagles and soar. I will walk and not faint. "Do not fear. I will help you. Do not be afraid. I will hold you with my right hand."

That's all I need

-Sam

What do you need?

Contemplative

It's a cold dreary day out there
And I am in here
I have been out there
The weather's not friendly
Today
Not jerky, just rude and arrogant

So I am sitting here taking a break from homework to blog. You can see how distracted I get. Anyhoo. I'm fish sitting this weekend for Becky. And I have an inability to say that word, which is bad! Anyway, Winston and Oliver are their names. Winston is orange and white and is larger than Oliver. He's active and swims around all the time. Oliver is the shy one. He is gold and is just content with finding new things on the bottom of the bowl. I have had much enjoyment just watching them swim around.


Okay I have noticed a lot of guys just staring out the window, [And I must confess I do it too sometimes] but we must have some very contemplative students here at God's Bible School. It seems that all the time when I exit or enter my room I am seeing someone just stare out the window at the end of the hall, which is five steps from my door. Like I said I do it too, either in the morning just looking at the sunrise, or when I am on the phone. I must admit it does give a very good view for the deep in thought, the bored, or the lonely. (It just gives you so many things to look at) And oddity of all oddities, I found muddy footprints on main campus today! Very cool looking and mysterious. No, unlike the girls in the girls dorm, we do NOT have binoculars. So whatever you're thinking as you stare out the window, think away! Just had to comment on that.



I have gotten four comments on my hair. #1 was from Mr. Shin. (pronounced Sin) he gestured with his finger and told me that my hair needed cut. #2 was from Miss Barr who asked if anyone had told me to cut my hair yet. #3 was from Miss McVey who asked if I was going with the "Frodo" look #4 was from Miss Stewart who said "You need to cut your hair!" and told me that I looked like a hobbit. Which I thought was very cool. So no, I shall wait another week to cut my hair, and then I shall shock the wits out of most.



No, the weather is definitely not friendly today. It's spitting snow now, and whipping up a storm.

I shall move on to more homework now, afterwards to help Mr. Proffit move. Which is the 2nd time in two weeks that I've helped someone move. (Kinda fun actually!)

-Sam