Lesson of the Week

Life's not easy. Get used to it.

"On my good days I'm an optimist." -Leanna Martin

It's hard living between self-sufficiency and an unhealthy reliance on God to do everything. I used to have the problem of wanting to do my own thing, but now it feels to me that I would rather back off and let God lead totally. It's easy for me to be lazy. (Although I'm not sure its difficult for others.) I choose my words carefully here, but what I mean is that it's easy for me to step back and let God control my life in such a way that I do not do anything but let him lead. It's easier to depend on God and not make any decisions, (to wait for a sign from Heaven or something), than to employ my brain and step up and make decisions based on my God-given knowledge, intelligence and wisdom. It's a fine line really, but it's my life that must be lived - somewhere between a selfish rebel and a lazy mannequin.

There are...
So many things I've been wanting to do...
So many questions in my head...
My weariness drowns them out...

Gazebo Again

Spending some time, well, enjoying some time here at Eden Park, at the gazebo again. Seth, Mel, Lana, Ike, and I are all studying, based on the decision that we wanted to go outside with our blankets and accomplish some homework. We sarcastically commented that we were coming simply coming strictly to study. This was said with slurred speech, smirks, and smiles. They are having an "adventure race" in the park today. The costumes are crazy. I believe first place goes to the two man team with burgundy bedsheets complete with winged camouflage hats. Second place goes to the couple with yellow shirts each individually and appropriately titled, "Macaroni" and "Cheese". Third place goes to the red outfitted couple with blue and white hair (to which Mel replied, "That's not real [hair]?").

Le is pondering why she is writing an essay. Mel and I retorted with a list. (Which is a great thing to do in case anyone ever asks any kind of question.)

Why Leanna Is Writing An Essay

1. Christian worldview (no idea what that means)
2. Good life experience (it's broadening)
3. It helps us think deeply about surface ideas
4. You'll thank me later, in other words, why not?
5. Increases creativity
6. Grade, passing college, general life happiness (because Mr. Profitt said so)
7. You'll probably learn to enjoy it. If not, you'll get over it

And here is the poem I promised on a realist's look on spring and the falling flower petals in Eden Park in Cincinnati...

A Realist's Look

Springtime snow
Little white petals falling
Blooming trees in spring
Blossoms bloomed
Trees are doomed
To die
But wait real quick
Before you pass judgment
They die every year
Morbid? No
Let's not begin another poem on death
Life may be a vapor
But it's also trees blooming in spring
From seeming dead trees
Little green buds appear
Symbols of spring here
Pink, lilac, and white
Trees in color bloom
Erasing all doom
That the winter brought
So before accusations
Of morbidity and pessimism
The truth of realism
Lies in the fallen dying petals
Life may be a vapor
But it's also trees blooming in spring

Breaking the Mold in Beautiful Weather

Dear Mold Breaker

I agree with the fact that you shouldn't let anything squish you into a mold.
(Not a big supporter of molds)

Perhaps the thing that gives me the greatest comfort and joy right now is that because of IHC I don't have classes tomorrow. That and I had a good day, especially getting to go to Eden Park for a time of walking, talking and prayer. It was for one of my classes here at school. The weather is so nice today. (Okay, I know I shouldn't really talk about the weather, but I gotta be happy when it's so nice outside!) I went later on today to Eden Park to study and play frisbee. Isaac also pulled out his tubes and brushes and set to work on a piece.



I also took a few pictures, just messing around with the sun and lighting effects.


Tonight I went to Teen Power and played a game of basketball.


Now...
I am whupped.

-Sam

Anyone?

So is there anyone out there other than me, that is suffering from a huge lack of motivation?

Well I stayed up until 4 o'clock this morning, and got up at five for a shower and spent some time with God before class. You may think I'm crazy to wake up that early, but it's the only time I have in the day where I'm not busy doing something. I enjoyed drama practice today: for the first time in my life, I get to pretend that I am dead in a play! This thrills me. Can anyone doubt that?Also cleaned my room today for Mr. Parriman's Iron Hammer Room Check. Ms. V's White Glove Room Check was also going on tonight across campus. I suppose the White Glove beats the Iron Hammer as far as crackdown, but I will not deny or argue the innate tendencies of the female populous to shame us guys in their cleaning skills. I shall leave the rest for your interpersonal debate. *smiles*

Thought I would leave a few pictures from the weekend. A group of us went out to Eden Park on a Friday evening strictly to study. It was beautiful there.





=


I unfortunately, did not get a whole lot of studying done, but succeeding in enjoying myself while there. I climbed up into the gazebo rafters and sat reading above everyone else. The oddity of oddities happened while I was sitting there. A lady come over while we were all studying and began staring around and up at the gazebo. After about half a minute she asked if there were any electrical outlets anywhere. We told her no, and then as she walked off, we looked at each other with incredulous looks and laughter.

IHC and VIP day coming up within the next few days here. It feels very odd to be experiencing everything as a GBS student. In fact it feels very weird to be saying that I am finishing up my freshman year of college. Can I just stop time?!?

The DOW Office

We are playing scum. There is a little note posted in the Dean of Women's office here at God's Bible School & College. It is full of innocence wit, humor and sarcasm:

"Dryers aren't drying all the way." -says Angel
"If you put more quarters in, it will dry longer, or maybe the load is just too big." - says Laura
"I agree with Laura." -says Dixie
"I believe the second statement is true." -says Valerie
"Did you empty the lint trip?" -says Ike
"Did you put your clothes in?" -says Keith

Here's another quote:
"It rains and I'm like, "Woe is me."' -Katie Bucher, speaking in class on her gratitude to God for the recent warm spring weather.

I love it.
-Sam

Spring and Stuff. What?

It is so beautiful today. Stop! Have you paid attention to the weather recently? Now hating small talk, this is the last topic I actually want to talk about, but I just wanted to let all of you hibernators know that now is the time to emerge!


Decided to do my homework outside today, by the fountain. I just decided that I wanted to enjoy the God-given weather. I am. The sunshine. The light wind. It's The soft roar of the water fountain which occasionally spits drops of water my way, or flicks a shot of misty water when the wind picks up. Who can argue with 71 degree weather? It is absolutely and thoroughly enjoyable out here. The campus is abuzz with people going here and there. Maintenance is working hard at beautifying this campus. So the grass is actually green now,


and the trees are budding - that makes me happy.

In recourse, I must confess my hesitation in all this joy of spring time because I have allergies which will soon begin to effect me with all this grass, trees and pollen coming to life.
Melatonin - that's what they call it. It's a hormone that the body generates when the body is exposed to sunshine. This hormone produces feelings of happiness and general contentment (similar to hormonal feelings of being "in love"). So now you know why you like this weather so much.
I also observed that (myself included) many people are wearing green today. [Okay, random!] May I again comment on how quickly the semester is coming to an end? A few more weeks and it'll be over. Now for some of you that's very scary, for others its a joy beyond compare.
I cannot recount all of what's happened over the past few days in which I had good intentions to blog about things that have happened, but due to busyness I have not. It's really a curse here at college: busyness. I have (regrettedly) gotten four hours of sleep in two nights previous and last night acquired a meager six hours to which afterwards I woke up 3 minutes before my first class started this morning. But things are good, in spite of the fact that I should be sleeping right now, I have been doing very well disciplining myself and God has really blessed the times when we spent time together. My advice? Don't get discouraged. Go outside and enjoy the weather. Spend some time talking with God and getting quiet listening to him.

Enough for now.

-Sam

Oh, and that little bird still sits at the corner of the dorm and sings. I wish he would sing his heart out.

Self-Discipline

A refreshing mist is falling outside.
Just enough to make [her] hair sparkle
And to make me feel alive inside
Or maybe it's just adding to the joy I already feel



I went to the library today to do some homework and to blog a little bit. The misty rain was so refreshing while I was walking that I just wanted to talk a long walk in it, or just sit and enjoy it. I was thinking this morning during my devotions why those verses Dr. Brown shared with us are so important. They allow us to daily become God-focused. Psalm 34:1: "I will bless THE LORD at all times, HIS praise shall continually be in my mouth." Psalm 118:24: "This is the day THE LORD has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it." Those verses involve focusing on God and a conscious choice to glorify Him. There is nothing more dangerous than to focus life on ourself.

Today in chapel Mr. Glick spoke on self-discipline: that dreaded subject, and antithesis of the self-centered nature, that thing to which I give a grimaced smile. Today, however, I eagerly anticipated this and actually took notes. Here you go: 2 Peter 1:5-6 - What would your life be like if you developed more self-discipline?

➊ Your spiritual life will flourish
▩ Whatever it means we will have to do it. Sometimes the only thing that stands between you and God is self-control
➋ Your health will improve
▩ Exercise, diet, health - 3 John 2
➌ Your academics will be acceptable
▩ The less reading, writing and schoolwork the happier we are. Let's stop goofing off, socializing and buckle down -
2 Timothy 2:15
➍ Your abilities will be maximized
▩ God gives us talents and then expects us to maximize it with self-control
➎ Your finances will be in order
▩ A self-disciplined person will know between needs and desires.
➏ Your relationships will be pure
▩ [Young people] don't fail [in relationships] because they're immoral or overtly evil, they just play with fire and go into situations they know will not be good for them.
➐ Your temper will be tamed
▩ Be slow in getting angry - Ephesians 4:26-27
➑ Your words will be moderated
▩ Our tongues reveal what we think and who we are - James 3
➒ Your priorities will be right
▩ You'll know what's important and you'll do it. You can't be a success and do your own thing
➓ Your life will be balanced
▩ Pray, study, sleep exercise, socialize

However, not wanting to stop short, Dr. Phil initiated a discussion in our 4th period ministerial meeting on practical application of this subject. We talked about alarm clocks and various things, but the most important things to think about in discipline are these: values, benefits, consequences, grace, and response. To answer the question, "Now what?" in response to the message here are five things we must think about: [1] Values. What do I value? (Make a list!) Where is this particular action on my list of values? You are generally highly motivated to do what you highly value. [2] Benefits. What are the benefits to disciplining myself, especially in any action? e.g. waking up! [3] Consequences. What consequences will I pay if I do not discipline myself? Where will I end up as a result of the lack of self-control? [4] Grace. Pray for grace (the desire and power to do God's will). [5] Response. Respond to the grace that God gives us to discipline ourselves and live for His glory.

"People avoid pain and seek pleasure." However if we will endure temporary periods of pain, our long term pleasure will be much greater. For example, when excercising (spiritually and physically) it is painful the first time we work out but if we want a certain result we will endure that pain to achieve anything. Reminds me of those people with prosthetic legs who win races.

Cognitive dissonance. Here's where we fall short: the habituation of the actions we willfully choose to do. Amidst those things we purpose to do, lie shortcuts and unknown trails which we often dangerously take. They are simple trailposts of self-indulgence, billboards that advertise laziness in flashy colors, neon signs that spell out "Lackadaisical", trailheads that make complacency look good, and city limit signs for 'Apathy City'.

Personally that's the easiest thing for me to do: not to discipline myself. But life revolves around discipline, and without it we are nothing! Here's a quote we were given in the meeting: "The test of your character is what it takes to stop you."




Enough said.

-Sam

Unlike Life, This is a Game

What I Was Doing 10 Years Ago:
1. Wearing a black t-shirt with a yellow number 7 on it aspiring to be the next Kenny Lofton
or the next big lead-off hitter for a major league baseball team
2. Singing while mowing the lawn
3. Pretending to be 'Gray Wolf' and have Senecan Indian council meetings

Five Things On My "To-Do List" Today:
1. Do homework
2. Mail letters
3. Purchase textbook
4. Blog
5. Have fun at late night

Four Snacks That I Particularly Enjoy:
1. Gummy fruit
2. Cookies
3. Pretzels
4. Nuts

Four Things I Would Do If I Were a Billionaire:
1. Start my own creative design company (clothing line, graphic design, & video production)
2. Build my own house and completely design it
3. Invest money in high interest return accounts and the church
4. Invest in Christian peoples lives by blessing them financially

Three of My Bad Habits:
1. Rolling back into bed after my alarm has gone off
2. Going to bed really late
3. Curling my hair/playing with my face

Two Places I Have Lived:
1. Massillon, OH
2. Cincinnati, OH

Four Jobs That I Have Had:
1. Jacob Glick Construction
2. Hiram's Roofing
3. Daniel Glick Construction/Repair
4. JC Expess/Kraftmaid Cabinet Delivery

I can't believe I did this.

Mind-blank

I have forgotten so many things about which I had thought of blogging about.

Fool!

My mocha exploded. Her chai is too hot. Lana learns how to eat a muffin. Looks like a doughnut now. Took some time on this tuesday morning to go get some coffee downtown. It's a wet chilly day - hoodie weather...

So I didn't exert any energy or thought today into pulling a prank on anyone. Being April Fool's Day I most certainly could have, I just didn't feel like it. It seems rather immature to me, I don't know. I have before, I'm just getting old I suppose, and I was tired when I actually thought of it being April Fool's. What about the fool? A fool says in his heart that there is no God. A fool shows his annoyance. A fool finds pleasure in evil conduct. A fool despises wisdom and discipline. A fool gives full vent to his anger. A fool shows his annoyance. A fool's complacency will destroy him. A chattering fool comes to ruin. Sometimes I feel like a fool in regards to complacency and discipline, but in searching I find an answer comes to me in the form of a question, "Does not wisdom call out?" (Pro. 8:1)

Spent the day doing many things: picked up tax papers, filled up my car with gas, had a duplicate key cut for my car, acquired snacks for college at the bulk food store, ate two wonderful bowls of chili, completed a fair amount of homework, and spent time hanging out with a couple friends of mine: one at her house and the coffee shop downtown, the other at Starbucks just to talk.



Tomorrow I go back home, or to my (as my roommate so quaintly puts it) "Dorm-sweet-dorm" in Cincinnati.

Simply,
Sam

I Rant:

Why are we content in our own little world? Selfish. Oh yes, selfish my friend. To have this gospel and not be sharing it. To be content with what life gives us. To be satisfied with the way we were raised. To squash our dreams with the status quo around us. Where are the trend-setting, non-conformist, revolutionary dreamers? Why are we not catching a fire and letting it burn within? Oh, I am so tired with the culture I inhabit. I despise the fact that people are not doing it the way it's never been done before. Just too eager to be nominal! I've never read of nominality in Scripture. We weren't created for the average. We are not vanilla ice cream people! Oh, but that's fine, that's exactly where Satan wants us. He's smiling you know.

-sam

Connections

I struggle with connections. Cognitive dissonance is what he called it. Where the rubber meets the road in life. Being a doer of the Word and not just a hearer only. The connection between belief and action. I've memorized this drama by heart. I know every line, every voice inflection, every cue. I know the director, the stage, the props, even the musical score, but it seems sometimes that I'm just acting. Simply knowing the part, repeating it to myself, but not believing in what the drama is all about. Familiarity and intelligence have numbed me, and I have so much regret to forget. Acting to try to be who I am.

It's 3:00 in the morning and I have just finished Paper #2.

-Sam

An All-Nighter with Coffee

Well its 1:34 AM. Here I am again. Blogging for the love of it.


I must share a confession with you...I love coffee. Walked out of my room earlier tonight and the hallway was filled with the scent of coffee. Oh, I loved it. I knew where it was coming from too. Isaac's room: clear on the other side of the dorm. Ahhh. I made my way over there a few minutes later, walked in the room, and pronounced, "Yoooou haaaave coffeee!" He smiled at me. In exchange for a cup of coffee I agreed to share the answers to the New Testament Test Review with him, at least the ones he had not already started on. That test should be easy tomorrow. I also have Principles of the Christian Life 2 test, a bit more difficult.

Went to the bathroom a second ago. Looked outside the window...it's raining. It was supposed to. How poetic for this long night.

Three and I went to the river this afternoon - that park next to the bridge. It was so beautiful out today. I'm glad I happened to 'be there at the right time' and was graciously invited to go along. It was really good to get out and enjoy the weather this afternoon since I have been cooped up doing all this pre-test homework. Found a beautiful spot between the parking lot and the river. The spot has stone bridge remains with pines and needle beds.

Easter weekend was so different for me this year. For one, I spent it away from home, with friends, at a different church. Went with a group of friends to Missie's house in the heart of Kentucky. We went horse back riding and I enjoyed breaking a blue eyed white horse into a gallop. We also enjoyed a fine tradition of sleeping till a fairly late hour in the morning. I regret not accomplishing as much homework as I wanted to. Okay, maybe I don't regret it. I had much fun. We took a walk at 2 in the morning down the road with the full moon in the sky. We also took an afternoon walk and had the dogs lag along with us. I had fun leap-frogging over people, even in surprise. I appreciated being in the country so much. Just being able to walk down the road, no cars, just comfortable clothes, slight wind, and perfect sun, talking and laughing. Her mom fed us in that familiar country family way in which felt I like royalty compared to cafeteria service. So delicious! Her sisters accent made me laugh. Come to find out her parents knew my family. Her father knew my elementary school teacher and has met and knows many relatives on my mom's side of the family. Too small of a world. Also found out her mom's girlfriend was "awestruck" by my father in college, during her single days. That just makes me laugh. Such a good weekend! We played Scum and watched movies too, had pillow fights, ate jellybeans, and just enjoyed each others company. I regret the blockbuster entertainment. This world's values and humor system are perverted and sickening. I cannot see Jesus enjoying that, and I did not. However, I should have been stronger in my convictions on intake of entertainment that clashes my views. Was also disappointed about not being able to traditionally watch The Passion

Am filled after fatherly correction with a renewed sense of purpose. Consistency. "Oh inconsistent me. Crying out for consistency."

Back to work.

-sAm

So Many Thoughts In My Head

So little time to share them. So many dreams I have, so little people who will dream with me.

She pegged it. Here I am...late, blogging once again. I just wanted to take the time to do so, although I really have a large load of homework to do before tests on Thursday. I have two Thursday, and an English Paper due Friday.


I gave blood for the first time yesterday which was an interesting experience. Wasn't too fond of the soreness the needle left in my arm, or the weakness it left me with, but I got food, a flower, and a sticker. Made me think of how much blood Jesus lost when He was crucified, and how weak he must have been. My pastor has said something to the effect of, "I never really can get discouraged or complain because everything pales in comparison to Calvary." That is so true.

Was sitting last night at my desk, staring out the window at the waning full moon, just enjoying the beauty of it. I am so glad that spring is finally here. I was able to drive with my window rolled down today and the music up loud. I love it. What a blessing to be in a new season. Before I know it, it will be warm and sunny all the time and soon the semester will be over. I feel very...I don't know. I can't put a word on it, or describe it. It's an odd feeling thinking back over my freshman year of college. Soon it will be spring break, then IHC, VIP day, and before it even sinks into my mind, the school year will be over. To think that it will soon be coming to an end, and as perception goes toward the end of all things, will be flying fast.

Time. It came. It went. What did I do?

Persecution, D-group, Easter Eggs & Passion

Excerpt from my notes in New Testament:
Sometimes I wonder how many of us would stick it out if we faced opposition. I know the wind and rain cause plants and trees to grow, and fire grows with the blowing wind. But what about us? What about me? (Some introspection here). We must have a God-focus. I wonder which among us would ultimately fall away, lag behind, quit, or give up. There are untold stories of the early church Christians that I think about. Okay, so eschatology does fascinate me, but come on! Christian persecution and opposition should stir us to greater things, turn the focus off ourselves and increase our trust in God.

So after two full days the rain has stopped. It turned into this thick wet snow which melted upon contact with the ground. All things must come to an end I suppose. D-group was very fun. Devotional was inspiring, food was awesome, and easter egg hunt was fun. Salami with cheese and crackers, sugar ball, (cream cheese, powdered sugar, crushed pineapple, sprinkles) cheesecurls, and mini candy bars! Mhmm!! I decided the best thing to do was to join the fun in the egg hunt. I really was scarred as a child...I never found as many eggs as everyone else. I just never understood why people should run like maniacs around the yard or house in search of eggs. Here were my rewards:


But I had fun tonight. I learned I should do my best, no matter what. Give the time I have right now to give the best of my energy all to the glory of God.

Lots of homework.
Big day tomorrow.
Fun weekend in store.

Passion. He had it. Do you?

-Sam